Inside My Weekend

Friday
No Workout // Feeling Sick
1/2 day at the office
Picked Colin up and went to lunch
Rested at the House
Went to Outback for Dinner
Went to Building 429 Concert with family and middle school students
home 2:00 am

Saturday
Slept in // 9:30
Still not feeling well
Mowed the Yard (hopefully the last time this year)
Went to a Wedding reception for Kaitlin Irons at 2:00
Meant High School students at Operation Hope to had out food (over 700 served)
Watched the Tennessee vs. Vandy game. A WIN for the vols :)
rest

Sunday
Up early 6:00 am
Prepped PPT for church service
Left for Church 8:30
Pre-Marriage session with family
Pastor Message James 5:1-6
Lunch at home
Rest
Set-up new desk in Summer's room
Watched football
In Bed Early

Pastor Joe

Building 429 Concert

Last night's concert with After Edmund, Addison Road and Building 429 was off the charts. We took a group of middle school students to outback for dinner (my favorite restaurant) then headed over to Vero High for the concert at 10pm. It was really cold outside...but inside the temperature was rising.

The show did not end until 12:30! One of the ministries they were supporting was world vision an organization that for $30 a month allows you to sponsor a child in a third world country. I had the opportunity to take my son "Colin" with me and when challenged to sponsor a child he raised his had. I saw his child like faith and told my wife we need to follow his lead "even though he is only 5". He heard the story of the hurt and pain and he said he wanted to help. So, we have a little girl from Mexico that we are now sponsoring.

The comment below is from Jason the lead vocals on how they named the band 429.

Jason: It's actually based on Ephesians 4:29 which says "Let nothing unwholesome come out of your mouth, except that which is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." And that seemed like a pretty good place to take a stand. We play quite a few secular venues, and we're Christian guys and we want to wear our faith on our sleeve, but we don't want to slap somebody on the head with our Bible. So this seemed like the perfect way to do that, because the more people ask us what our name means, the more we have a chance to talk about what we believe.

I had seen Building 429 in concert in several different venues in years past...but last night placed them in my top 10 all time shows. The lights, music, and show was awesome.

On another note there was these two guys to the left of us and two rows down that decided that they were going to put on their own show for the audience. These two guys had no clue that they were even at a Christian concert...CLUELESS. These young man started dancing "Micheal Jackson" style and did not stop until the show ended. It made for a good laugh.

Thank you middle school for an awesome evening!

Pastor Joe

Teens turned aliens: How to communicate with kids in tough years

Parenting teens is a tough, stressful job these days, but the payoff can be huge with a reserve of patience and the drive to ask for help when needed.

Here are some strategies:

Declaration of independence

Adolescence is about struggle - for identity, independence - but the grab for power often competes with the intense need for reassurance at home and conformity among peers.

Teens may fight the leash while also taking comfort in it. Robin Goodman, a child psychologist and art therapist in New York City, suggests parents lengthen the tether, stay involved and step in sooner rather than later when newfound freedoms are abused. Remember, she said, defiance is a tool used by teens. It's nothing personal.

In the heat of the moment

Dr. Mark Goulston, a Los Angeles psychiatrist who once trained FBI hostage negotiators, said parents must leave behind their fear, denial and "don't ask, don't tell" avoidance of confrontation and trust their guts in recognizing potentially violent behavior.

To help rather than hinder, try calming down an upset adolescent in a heated moment by repeating what he says in a slow, measured tone. Hopefully, he'll begin to listen at the speed you're talking and feel validated, not violated.

Help! My teen is an alien!

Sarah Newton, author of the book "Help! My Teenager is an Alien," said parents must learn to translate the intergalactic language of their kids to help make things run smoothly. Some parents are fond of the opening lines: "I know how you feel" or "In my day."

But you don't know what it's like to be a teen today, so stop what you're doing, look them in the eyes and zip your lips. Try to see a situation from their point of view, not through your own filters. Make it clear you want to understand and need their help.

Be a parent, not a pal

Parenting is not a popularity contest. Don't be afraid for your child not to like you for a time over words spoken or rules imposed.

Mix criticism with praise. Be respectful, not insulting, and don't dismiss your teens' feelings or opinions as silly or senseless, said Rick Edwards, inpatient program director at the nonprofit Southwest Mental Health Center, a children's psychiatric hospital in San Antonio.

Let go of guilt

Dr. Jason Stein, a family therapist in Los Angeles, said parents of out-of-control teens are often vilified, leading to unnecessary guilt.

"As a parent you're not allowed to show your humanity and struggle. You're not allowed to say, 'I hate my kid.' We've stigmatized these kinds of parents," he said. "We need to acknowledge the struggle. You basically buck up and do the best you can."

By Leann Italie - Associated Press Writer

I Love You Dad

Below is an email that I recieved this morning from my son's t-ball coach Jay. His son has been in Afghanistan for about 2 weeks. It kinda puts all our problems in perspective...

-Pastor Joe

Monday, September 22, 2008 10:16:42 AM Dad, I do need a few things

1. An absentee ballot, if you could send me one. They have something here, but it closes before I get off work. I think it will be easier if you send me one compared to getting one sent online.

2. I'd like to purchase some land when I get back, somewhere in the mountains away from a town, maybe 5 acres or more. I've been looking, but time is crunched. I can't use my own computer, because everything here has to have security clearances and you can only use theirs. I was thinking NC, VA, maybe even TN. Just look into it, I believe it's going to be the only thing that is worth much soon. You can put a cabin up for 12000 dollars, they come in pieces and it takes like 3 days to put them up. One could buy some solar panels for small electronic devices such as laptops, cell phones, etc. The refrigerator and stove can be run off propane (I'll have to look into how expensive that is). That's pretty much how I want to live. The simple life. Walden, by Henry David Thoreau, is about Thoreau building his own cabin and living away from society for two years. It's very interesting what your priorities become out there. I tell you what, I will let you and mom build a vacation house on my land if you find me a good piece. Try to settle mom down about getting me stuff. I don't need things.

I am having trouble reading the Bible. I guess I have a pretty good overview of it and when I start reading it just sounds repetitive. I know that's wrong, but I just can't get into it. My prayer and worship are good. I struggle with other's intentions during their worship. We have this nut that changes his voice completely and gets very soft and dramatic when he prays, "Oh yes, Father God, I just want to thank you, Father God, we love you so much, Father God, Father God, you are awesome, Father God." I just want to shake him and say, "He knows his own name. You don't have to repeat it to Him religiously" (pun intended). It just reminds me of the people shouting prayers on the street corners just to be heard. It really messes with my head. Then I feel bad that my heart isn't where it's supposed to be when all of this is going on. You really have to push the "love others" around here. People are so ignorant thinking all Afghans are bad and complaining about any little obstruction to their daily priorities. "YOU SIGNED UP FOR THIS." Heaven forbid you have to do something that you don't enjoy! Just pray for me to have compassion and humility.

I already got into a little tiff when someone pushed me. I saw red and pushed back, which I shouldn't have done...I guess the stress is getting to me a little. 17 people have died since we've been here. They cart them down the road in a flatback humvee in their caskets with the American Flag draped over it. All available personnel line the streets with a salute. This usually happens at midnight, separating my sleep in two.

I know this letter sounds depressing, but I'm not depressed. I'm me, working continuously and thinking and trying to figure out what God wants from me in this chaotic world we all live in.

I love you Dad

Teen suicides dip, experts worry rate remains high

CHICAGO (AP) — The number of teen suicides has fallen slightly, but the rate remains disturbingly high, possibly fueled by drug warnings that have scared many from using antidepressants.

The suicide rate was about 4.5 per 100,000 in 2005, the most recent data available. That follows an 18% spike the previous year that alarmed experts when first reported.
That's because until then, suicides among 10- to 19-year-olds had been on a steady decline since 1996.

DRUGS: Illicit use actually dipped in 12- to 17-year-olds in '07
BETTER LIFE: Latest kids' health studies

Dr. David Fassler, a psychiatry professor at the University of Vermont, said the report suggests a "very disturbing" upward trend that correlates with a decline in teen use of antidepressants.
FIND MORE STORIES IN: Ohio Food and Drug Administration Columbus University of Vermont University of Illinois-Chicago Nationwide Children Dr. David Fassler

That decline stems from the Food and Drug Administration's 2004 black-box warning label because of reports that the drugs can increase risks for suicidal tendencies.

Fassler, who wasn't involved in the new study, is among psychiatrists who believe the drugs' benefits, including treating depression that can lead to suicide, outweigh their risks. He said he has no financial ties to makers of antidepressants.

The new report shows the rate dropped by about 5% from 4.7 in 2004 — or from 1,983 suicides in 2004 to 1,883 in 2005.

That's still 600 more suicides than would have been expected had the earlier trend continued, said lead author Jeffrey Bridge, a researcher at Nationwide Children's Hospital in Columbus, Ohio.

Patrick Tolan, director of the University of Illinois-Chicago's juvenile research institute, said it will be important to continue tracking teen suicides to see if the rate continues to decline or hovers at a higher than expected level.

Regardless, suicide remains a leading cause of teen deaths and "a major public health issue," he said.

Love God, Love Others

I recently received a forward email from a group of friends that was really disappointing. Here is the email and my response. And yes I still love them :)

[the email]
I didn't watch this, but this article about the Rick Warren presidential forum was interesting:http://www.gopusa.com/theloft/?p=760

How an evangelical like Warren can side with Obama is beyond me...But per this article author, that's the way she interpreted what she saw... If Rick Warren is for that pro-baby killer, I'm not interested in anything else he has to say....He's said all he needs to say... TL

PS If McCain picks a pro-baby killer for his veep, he ain't gettin' my vote either.He's already p!$$ed me off with his pro-illegal immigration stance, but he'll step way over the line if he goes pro-'Choice' for VP.He's a really old 72 - I doubt that he'll last 4 years. So his veep choice is really important to me too....I'll go for that Constitution Party guy (I don't even know his name, but I'll find out if I have to) before McCain if he picks a 'Choicer'...

[my response]
Good morning friends,

I am concerned about the content of any email that is part of the Christian community and carries such critical and judging language. For so long the Church of Jesus Christ has pretended to be perfect and point fingers at the not perfect and the non-Christian community. If we all were truly honest with each other…the reason that we came to faith in Christ is because of our brokenness and need for the Master. The church community as we know it carries a hypocritical tag simply because we think we have arrived and the rest of the world...well you get the picture. We have grown up reciting, teaching, and even leading John 3:16. We have proclaimed that “God so loved the world” from the roof tops but forgot the second greatest commandment…”Love your neighbor”.

What saddens me is that we have failed to read on in the Gospel of John…particularly John 3:17. John 3:17 is clear “God did not come into the world to judge the world but save the world”. If the master “Jesus” did not come to judge the lost but save them then what right do we have. We have no authority to judge someone else or their motives (Matthew 7:1). Does that mean that we should not be responsible and form a Biblical world view? I think not! God has given us the Holy Spirit for discernment and the freedom to choose. When we lash out and speak negatively about a person, a group (Ephesians 4:29), point fingers (Luke 6:42) as the body of Christ I believe we miss the mark that God has called us to follow.

In conclusion agree or disagree with Obama, McCain or even Rick Warren…let’s work out our differences between ourselves and God. What if we began to pray for people instead of judging and condemning people? What if we began to pray for our leaders? What if we simply trust God “who is absolute” with the next presidential office. What if?

Check out this link http://www.theworkofthepeople.com/index.php?ct=store.details&pid=V00244

Pastor Joe

Teens Engage in Sexting

A funny picture or a flirty message on your phone may seem innocent enough, but what is your teen really saying when they send a text."Teenagers are having sex by the phone, sending flirty messages, meeting up to have sex," says 16 year old Rochellie Garcia."

On the one hand it can be kind of fun to get an erotic message over your email or on the phone," says Certified Sex Therapist Joyce Joseph. "But on the other hand none of that is really safe or private."It's known to teens as sexting, and though it doesn't always lead to a physical act, Joseph says it can confuse teenagers emotionally."

They're experimenting with sex but they aren't integrated in a holistic way that would be better for their self-esteem if they really understood what love was," says Joseph.

Teens who text may not have the chance to discuss those feelings with an adult, because one of the appeals of sexting is the ability to hide the behavior from parents. "I don't wanna talk on the phone that much, because my mom will ask me questions," says a teenage boy. "So I just text people.""It's your phone, it's your own private business," says 16 year old Mackenzie Hamblin. "So if you want to do that stuff go ahead."

Privacy may be part of the appeal, but what many teens don't realize is how easily the message or pictures they send can be forwarded to dozens of unwanted recipients."All you gotta do is take it and send it out, thinking it's funny," says Garcia. "But the boys you're sending it to can take it and put it on MySpace or put it somewhere where everyone can see it."

Last week former American Idol hopeful Colin Leahy made national news when he was arrested for sending sexually explicit text messages to a 12 year old boy. A situation Joseph says teens need to be aware of, and prepared to report. "If you've asked them to stop and they don't stop, and or the message is offensive to you, then you need to immediately act and block that number," says Joseph.

And as technology continues to change the ways teens can communicate, Joseph says parents need to monitor who their teens are talking to, and more importantly what they are talking about."It's really important that parents sit down and talk to their teenagers and help them to develop the emotional and intimacy skills," says Joseph. "So that when and if they are ready to be sexual that they are much more balanced."