What I wish someone told me about youth ministry…

This was a blog that I get from a youth pastor that I follow and thought it was worth sharing.

1. It’s very emotional, unlike any other job. You’ll experience the highest of highs, and the lowest of lows.

2. It’s very messy, and always will be as long as you work with people who are just as imperfect and sinful as you are.

3. It’s constantly changing. Youth culture never stays the same from year to year, and neither do the kids, values, nor worldviews. Youth ministry must always morph along with it. As soon as you think you have a handle on it, think again.

4. It requires strong vision casting. Any leadership position does, but leadership in youth ministry does especially. Your leaders, teens, parents, church and community all depend on it.

5. Don’t think you need to do it all. In fact, the ministry is healthier when you enable others to serve instead of taking responsibility for every youth event, trip, fundraiser, small group, idea, and strategy that furthers the vision.

6. No matter what people at your new church say, don’t make deep rooted changes in the ministry until after two years of building trust and respect.

7. Live a life that is above reproach in everything. Eventually even “little things” will come to light and you will be held to a higher level of accountability for it.

8. Kids really don’t care how “cool” you are or how well you know scripture as much as they care about how much you love them as individuals, not as a group.

9. Have a firm grasp on what your values are in ministry and make sure they’re are aligned with a church’s written and unwritten values before accepting a paid youth ministry position there.

10. Don’t be too discouraged if you don’t see results and life-change take place right away. Sometimes it takes years, and even then you won’t always hear about it.

What do you wish someone would’ve told you about youth ministry before you got started? 

When you started out as a parent, chances are you felt completely unprepared to deal with the challenges of a child. But at some point in your journey, you've probably found yourself feeling confident in your parenting role and abilities. The routine and predictability of your child's life became manageable and fairly easy to navigate. Now that your child is a teenager (or soon-to-be a teen), you may be feeling overwhelmed at times with fear, confusion, frustration, and a lack of understanding. It almost feels like you're starting all over with a screaming, needy, and sometimes whiny child (only much taller and with more attitude!).

The changes of adolescence, while normal for every teen, feel completely abnormal to parents of teenagers, often leaving you feeling like a helpless bystander. But you're not alone and there is hope to help you (and your teen) get through these challenging, changing years.

For more than 30 years, Dr. Walt Mueller has studied adolescents and the culture that surrounds them. His expertise was put to the test when his own children became teenagers. Now he's bringing wisdom from research and his own experience to help other parents through the tumultous years of adolescence. 

With empathy and practical tools, this book will help you understand the changes your teen is experiencing, and help you effectively parent them as you explore how to:

• create a smoother adolescent period for your teen
• begin to break through the walls of confusion, fear, frustration, and misunderstanding
• be a positive and proactive bridge-builder into the life and world of your teenager

Regain the confidence you once felt as a parent, and create a parent-teen relationship that helps your teen (and you) get through these change-filled years successfully. 

Pre-order sale price: $8

Brand New! Coming May 2009!
Accepting Pre-orders now. Click here to order.
Books will be shipped in early May.

Boundaries with Teens // theparentlink

In this exciting new book, Dr. Townsend gives important keys for establishing healthy boundaries—the bedrock of good relationships, maturity, safety, and growth for teens and the adults in their lives. The book offers help in raising your teens to take responsibility for their actions, attitudes, and emotions.

http://www.realworldparents.com/store/item/boundaries_with_teens/ 

Leaders Devo // Leaders Seek the Guidance of God

"A leader never lets adversity get him down-except on his knees." -Jim Williams

Everyone depends on the leader for answers. "Where do we go next?" What's our goial?" "Should we move ahead or wait?" It's the leader who must make the decision, sometime choosing between the greater of two goods or the lesser of two evils. Effective leaders have learned this secret of leadership: they are not alone. When forced to make tough choices, theu seek the counsel of the One greater than themsleves. They seek the guidance of God.

Competence, skill, and intelligence - all of these are important attributes forleadership. But there is one greater: faith. Truly great leaders believe in someone greater than themselves, and they express that belief in regualr times of reflection and devotion.

Their times of prayer signify a spiritual relationship with the Almighty that makes them feel accepted and loved, even when their associates or peers have abandoned them.

To them, prayer is not a way out. It is a way through. The strength that is derived from communication with God sustains them through times of adversity.

Leaders have a spiritual support system.

BEFORE GRADUATION

Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.

Proverbs 22:6

Sometime in spring each year, I hear myself say, “It’s almost over.” I note that another school year is coming to an end. Because I have ministered with young people most of my life, every year I approach May and June with mixed emotions. I know how exciting it is to be finished with teachers, classes, and homework and to look forward to a summer of fun. And for high school graduates, the future seems exciting, filled with potential. But I also know of the shipwrecked lives—kids who never even make it to summer because of unrestrained celebrations at proms and other parties. It seems like every year we read of carloads of kids who are killed through drinking and driving, and other tragedies.

And as I watch seniors (Lisa, Whit, etc..) walk across the stage to receive their diplomas, I know that they will be headed for the whole range of ups and downs as they make the precarious transition into adulthood. Our future as a nation truly does rest with this generation, and I wonder what that future will hold.

I also wonder about the kind of world we are giving them. Truly my generation has made many great contributions, but we have also formed a society based on self-centeredness, materialism, and greed. It’s a violent world, filled with guns, crime, abortion, and abuse. Despite the progress and the optimism of the ’60s and ’70s, racism is on the rise again. Personal freedom and choice have come to mean that a person should have the right to do almost anything he or she wants . . . with no restraints. Families are falling apart. In addition, the obviously twisted and abnormal homosexual lifestyle is being touted as normal. And this generation has been trying its best to purge public life of every trace of biblical faith.

It’s not a pretty sight, but it’s not hopeless. There is time to change the direction . . . but it must begin with our children.

This is a good time to think about our kids . . . of all ages. We need to reach them now—we dare not wait until graduation. What are we doing to teach them the right values?

What are we doing to motivate them to serve others? What are we doing to heal their pain and meet their needs? What are we doing to lead them to Christ?

Think of what you can do to reach this generation. There is no better investment of your life.

TV or the Internet // theparentlink

When asked if they'd rather give up TV or the Internet for a week, 77% of teens said they'd forgo the tube. [mediapost.com, 4/21/09]

Among children and teens who play video games, nearly one in 10 shows multiple signs of being addicted, according to Iowa State University researcher Doug Gentile. His new study reveals that about 8.5% of game-playing youth demonstrated at least six of 11 "addiction" symptoms, ranging from skipping chores to play, to lying about how much they play, to stealing money to buy a game. Nancy Shute, a parenting blogger for U.S. News & World Report, believes the study confirms what most folks already recognize. "The bottom line: You already know if gaming is causing problems for your child and your family," she writes. "And if it is, you know the solution, too."

Inside My Weekend

Friday
½ day in the office: Final Planning for Vision Retreat
Picked up Colin and went swimming in the pool
Final prep before students and team arrive
Vision Retreat
Dunkin
Dunkin Doughnuts and Banana Splits
Finished 10:30

Saturday
Up Early
Vision Retreat 8:30 (awesome students)
Pizza for Lunch
Rest (Watched the NFL Draft)
Work on Pool (hose burst)
A little swim and then dinner at a local Mexican restaurant
Move: The Mummy III
Bed Time

Sunday
Up Early
prepped the visuals for the morning services
Left for the church at 8:15
Hung out in the middle school study
Lunch at Ruby Tuesday's
Made a visit to a student's home
Dinner with the Cuellar's at our home
In Bed Early